Final Destination Bloodlines

Imagine if your room-mate kept getting recurring nightmares that she was going to find herself impaled on a rusty bit of iron after falling from a collapsed revolving restaurant hundreds of feet in the air? Yep - I’d probably just quietly put a pillow over her head one night, too. Luckily, “Stefani” (Kaitlyn Santa Reyes) gets to go home and try to get to the bottom of things. When she mentions this to her family, it turns out that the dream has it’s roots in fact and that is all comes down to whacky grandma “Iris” (Gabrielle Rose) who lives in a remote location that wouldn’t have looked out of place in a “Mad Max” movie and who has her own theory about just what happened on that very night, fifty years ago, and about death. As with the other “Final Destination” series, death is much more of an animate object with a plan, a scheme and boy does it not like it when a plan doesn’t come together. Pretty swiftly, the young lass concludes that over the intervening years the grim reaper has been settling scores and now it is the turn of her family. They all think she’s bonkers, but when their attitudinal cousin “Erik” (Richard Harmon) finds himself having an exceptionally narrow escape, they begin to sit up and take notice. Thing is, though, do they seriously think they can thwart the original man with the scythe? You know that expression about a moth fluttering it’s wings by the Amazon and there being an tsunami in Sri Lanka? Well some of the deathly cause and effect scenarios here are just as entertainingly far fetched as we learn to appreciate the terrors of some otherwise benign garden implements, a nose-ring and a rusty old weathervane - to name but a few instruments - that can be used to facilitate our always brutal and gory journey to the hereafter. The disasters-in-waiting are all fairly visually teed up for us, so we can anticipate the grizzle before it inevitably occurs - but what we can’t always do is anticipate just how these incidents will pan out. Death may have a plan, but it’s an adaptable one and as the family start to dwindle in typically slasher-horror fashion we are able to pick out favourites (mine was the annoying “Aunt Brenda” (April Talek)) and hope that they might be next! This is enjoyable stuff that needs to be watched in the spirit intended. No, the script isn’t up to much nor are any of the standard acting performances from the Blumhouse book of scream then run before making implausible decisions and ending up - well you know how that usually pans out. Aim low and be prepared to be entertained, and though overlong, this ought to make you giggle and cringe a little.

'Final Destination Bloodlines' is unexpectedly terrific. I watched the original five movies two months ago and highly enjoyed the first flick, though the subsequent follow-ups weren't the best (though I did like 'Final Destination 5'). This is the best sequel, no doubt. What I wanted going in was mindless fun and cool deaths. For me, it ticked both of those boxes with full conviction. I think I gained entertainment from every offing, which is pleasing. They are very nicely done, rather creative too. I'm sure the plot has holes, but honestly... "we don't care". The cast are all pleasing, there isn't anyone who blew me away or anything but I did really enjoy those onscreen here. Kaitlyn Santa Juana is the standout, but Gabrielle Rose, Richard Harmon and the rest (I see you, Teo Briones of 'Chucky') are all good value. The special effects are satisfying, as well. I will state that the film is possibly more funny than I think it intends to be, which isn't a bad thing whatsoever for me but I did sense it wasn't quite intending to be as amusing as it is in parts; even if they are, of course, going for laughs still. Maybe I'm wrong. All's well that ends well, either way. I'd rank this higher than the original. There isn't much in it, but this does narrowly outdo that one in my opinion. Kudos to all involved, because this release could've easily went down like a lead balloon (that sounds like a plot for one of these films; I want compo if that's what FD7 turns out to be, New Line Cinema).

Best final destination movie yet. It's unpredictable, tense and beautifully shot. Also love that they included Mortal Kombat 1 gameplay and had a cameo for Kitana showing off her fatal blow and gameplay. Awesome way to show and reference Mortal Kombat and the character of Kitana.

Frankly I'm amazed at the glowing reviews. Whilst "Final Destination: Bloodlines", isn't a bad film, its not without its shortcomings. On the upside acting is competent, the story-line predictable but polished, with believable, relatable, characterisations. There's also a competently handled dose of sixties nostalgia, that taps into the kinds of fears anyone who has eaten at a revolving restaurant, perched atop a tall tower, might entertain. Having eaten at two, one in Hong Kong and another in China, myself, this felt familiar and did make me chuckle (nervously). Where I believe, this film falls down, is it could have crafted, cunningly clever kills, without the need to make them gratuitous. I found this aspect of the film, off putting and I probably wont watch another, for this reason. Its cheap, tasteless, sensationalist and frankly, unnecessarily degrades, what otherwise, could have been an eerily entertaining experience. In summary, a lot to like but the heavy handed, gratuitously cruel, cringe worthy, death scenes, for me, detracted from the enjoyment of this film.

This was creative, gory, hilarious, and an eminently appropriate swan song for horror legend and scream king Tony Todd. (As no FD film would be complete without Bludworth taking a moment to philosophize malevolently about death.) This iteration nails everything, from the tremendous opening sequence to the gory, creative, often hilarious death sequences, and sprinkles in a few other cameos you may recognize if you're familiar with the series. It also throws a few curve balls to keep things interesting, and I definitely wasn't expecting the soundtrack to contain banger after banger nor for the jokes to land so well, but the writers knocked it out of the park. The only downer is that Tony Todd is clearly in his last days, and if you're a horror fan, that was tough to see. I'm just glad he got to do what he loved until the very end. Forget Disney. Forget Mission Impossible 3. Go see Final Destination: Bloodlines and actually have some fun instead.