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Walker - (Apr 25th)
90s cheese not quite as good as 80s cheese, but still an entertaining enough action-thriller, though some moments were laughable and not in a good way (Snake riding surfing a wave isn't all that bad ass), plus the effects work was rather poor. I don't have a great fondness for Escape from New York, however it was far superior. **3.0/5**
So Los Angeles has become a glorified open-air prison (who'd have thought?) and "Snake" (Kurt Russell) is invited to do his "Mad Max" thing and go in, at considerable peril to himself, and fetch a gadget that could enable the US President (Cliff Robertson) - or anyone else with the codes, for that matter - to use a satellite in the best traditions of "Diamonds are Forever" (1971) and destroy parts or all of the world. The twist, well it turns out that it's "Utopia" (A.J. Langer), who just happens to be the president's disgruntled daughter, who is the one who took the device into the lawless wasteland in the first place and enforcer "Malloy" (Stacey Keach) is determined to get it back, regardless of whether or not she comes back with it. It's a derivative mess, this film. It's rooted in so many other stories that are much better executed; there is simply no menace or jeopardy at all, and John Carpenter seems unsure whether he wants an all-out action film or a semi-comedy. Russell is always at his more entertaining with the latter, here he just comes across as a man with a mission who is no more interested in the plot than I was. Steve Buscemi doesn't really add much either as the duplicitous "Eddie" and I am sure I spotted Peter Fonda in here too - a payday for a few actors who ought to have known better. The effects and pyrotechnics are adequate but the nadir in a basketball court surrounded by gun-toting assassins who could't hit a cow on the tit with a tin cup just put the icing on this really undercooked muffin.
Joan Wilder is thrust back into a world of murder, chases, foreign intrigue... and love. This time out she's duped by a duplicitous Arab dignitary who brings her to the Middle East, ostensibly to write a book about his life. Of course, he's up to no good, and Joan is just another pawn in his wicked game. But Jack Colton and his sidekick Ralph show up to help our intrepid heroine save the day.
Carol Anne has been sent to live with her Aunt and Uncle in an effort to hide her from the clutches of the ghostly Reverend Kane, but he tracks her down and terrorises her in her relatives' appartment in a tall glass building. Will he finally achieve his target and capture Carol Anne again, or will Tangina be able, yet again, to thwart him?
After the ordeal with Samara, Rachel and Aiden move to a rural town. But soon Rachel learns about the death of a girl in a similar fashion. To save Aiden, she must dig into Samara's past even further.
After being murdered by corrupt colleagues in a covert government agency, Al Simmons makes a pact with the devil to be resurrected to see his beloved wife Wanda. In exchange for his return to Earth, Simmons agrees to lead Hell's Army in the destruction of mankind.
An earthquake shatters a peaceful Los Angeles morning and opens a fissure deep into the earth, causing lava to start bubbling up. As a volcano begins forming in the La Brea Tar Pits, the director of the city's emergency management service, working with a geologist, must then use every resource in the city to try and stop the volcano from consuming LA.
The army of the Marauders, led by King Terak and the witch Charal, attack the Ewoks village, killing Cindel's family. Cindel and the Ewok Wicket escape and meet Teek in the forest, a naughty and very fast animal. Teek takes them to a house in which an old man, Noa, lives. Like Cindel, he also crashed with his Starcruiser on Endor. Together they fight Terak and Charal.
An old gangster is advised that Freddie Mays would leave jail after thirty years in prison. His mood changes and he recalls when he was a young punk and who joined Freddie's gang—a man he both envied and ultimately betrayed.
In a seaside California town, best friends Mac and Nick are on opposite sides of the law. Mac is a former drug dealer trying to clean up his act, while Nick is a high-profile detective trying to take down a Mexican drug lord named Carlos. Soon Nick's loyalties are put to the test when he begins an affair with restaurateur Jo Ann - a love interest of Mac's - unwittingly leading his friend into a police-orchestrated trap.
The team behind Scary Movie takes on the comic book genre in this tale of Rick Riker, a nerdy teen imbued with superpowers by a radioactive dragonfly. And because every hero needs a nemesis, enter Lou Landers, aka the villainously goofy Hourglass.
Robot Johnny 5 moves to the city to help his friend Ben Jahrvi with his toy manufacturing enterprise, only to be manipulated by criminals who want to use him for their own nefarious purposes.
A group of young gunmen, led by Billy the Kid, become deputies to avenge the murder of the rancher who became their benefactor. But when Billy takes their authority too far, they become the hunted.